Should and Addiction

How many times have you said to yourself “I should have…….”?  Saying “should” is a big mistake that we all make from time to time.  Words have strong meanings in our lives and influence us in unbelievable ways.  Be careful what you put on yourself.

Dr. Arthur Freeman and Rose DeWolf talked about the “nature of should” in their book, “The 10 Dumbest Mistakes…”:  “Should is action without thinking.  Should is a command that carries a warning label: ‘Don’t you dare deviate by as much as a millionth of a millimeter or you’ll be sorry, you’ll feel guilty, you’ll feel ashamed, others will point their fingers at you—and they should.’”

The joy of merely “being” without putting “should” on our life allows us to deal with the here and now without getting caught up in either the past or the future.  Thus there is no depression or anxiety with which to associate.  “By honoring the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve and your life flows with joy and ease” as stated by Eckhart Tolle.

Most of us have a tendency to be compassionate toward others yet rarely are willing to give ourselves a break.  Removing the “should” from our lives helps to cultivate a virtue of compassion which is a requirement for optimal health.  So are you willing to drop any and all of the “should” items you place on your life?  What a marvelous act of generosity you will be giving yourself and other wonderful people.

“Grace is not part of consciousness; it is the amount of light in our souls, not knowledge nor reason. — Pope Francis